


Brave little things

by TinyPineTrees



Series: In the Woods Somewhere [2]
Category: Peaky Blinders (TV)
Genre: Alpha Alfie Solomons, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, M/M, Omega Tommy Shelby, Panic Attacks, Rape/sexual assault referenced
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-28
Updated: 2020-02-28
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:53:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22938979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinyPineTrees/pseuds/TinyPineTrees
Summary: Tommy tries handling things for the first time since the incident.
Relationships: Tommy Shelby/Alfie Solomons
Series: In the Woods Somewhere [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1648585
Comments: 11
Kudos: 94





	Brave little things

**Author's Note:**

> Please double check the tags! Enjoy reading! ❤️ This is a oneshot following In the Woods Somewhere, and might not make much sense if you haven’t read it!

Tommy sniffed and flicked his cigarette. The ash floated in a dainty arc, burning with a dim glow until it died in the muddy puddles drenching the cobblestones. He pulled a note from his pocket, double checking the time and date. 

_‘Noon, Monday. Near Auntie Doris’ Favorite lock.’_

He wasn’t entirely sure which canal lock was Esme’s aunt’s favorite, but if he had to guess he’d have picked this one. He’d only met her once, but she’d struck him as someone who preferred nature to the city. 

Stepping back, he leaned beneath the shallow awning, and tried to shake off the nerves prickling over his skin. Campbell had been killed nearly four months ago now. 

This was just a meeting. A meeting with one of Esme’s cousins. 

He’d arranged and attended too many meetings like this to be so worried. He sniffed again, brushing a finger over his nose to wipe the mist off. 

On a bright day, the canal might’ve been green. Thick overgrown bushes had taken over, eating into the bricks and choking the weeds that still dared to grow. ‘Brave little things’, Alfie had called them once, when Tommy had needed him here for a meeting. He’d watched as Alfie blinked at them, and tapped his cane against the bushes, nudging them to the side. As if he wanted to give the weeds room to grow. 

Tommy sighed and glanced down the canal, hoping to spot a long boat. 

The oily, brown water would’ve been nearly gray on a warm day, though nothing would ease the smell. Rotten fish and coal smoke lay heavily over the misty water. Each lazy raindrop that disturbed the river only heightened the smell, adding its own damp and dank touch. 

All the same, it was one of the few locks that hadn’t had the greenery trimmed away, and that he assumed Esme’s aunt might like. 

There wasn’t much to do but wait. 

He pressed his back further against the wall and shivered as the wind cut sharply through the canal. Old fears bubbled to the surface as he waited, creeping out to murmur in his ear. 

It was a canal, not a dock, and it’s just Jimmy Lee. He’s Esme’s cousin. He doesn’t have a history of hurting anyone. This is just business. 

The chill crept into his coat and sank into his bones. Alfie wouldn’t like it if he caught-

It didn’t matter. Alfie didn’t need to know if he had meetings. He’d never needed to know before. 

This would’ve been easier though, had Alfie been-

He didn’t need Alfie’s permission, or Arthur’s either for that matter. 

They could just-

He flicked his watch open, checking the time again in an attempt to distract himself. It was nearly noon. 

Inhaling with a slow shaky breath, he dropped his cigarette to the ground and slid his eyes shut. Weak holly fluttered through the air, whispering with a nervousness around him. The wet wall soaked into his hair and dripped down his neck. 

Docks and canals are different. Canals are safe. People don’t get kidnapped from canals. There were too many escape routes, it would be hard to kidnap someone here. 

Kent’s nauseating watery scent brushed up around him, jolting his heart and forcing his head to fly up. Rotten holly quickly overpowered the scent of the canal. 

_‘It’s just in your head Tom, Kent’s dead,’ Arthur said, his voice croaking as he spoke. ‘Relax, alright? He’s dead.’_

_‘Kent’s dead.’ John agreed, trying to nod convincingly._

Kent wasn’t dead and Arthur and John were both bad liars.

His nose wrinkled in frustration. They didn’t have to keep things from him, he wasn’t going to break into pieces at the sound of his name. 

They had a point though, he had before- 

It didn’t matter. Tommy shook his head with a violent jerk. Alfie had promised him they wouldn’t keep secrets. 

“Tommy Shelby!” Jimmy’s bright voice called from the water. 

Tommy jerked and stepped away from the wall, fixing his cap as he rolled his shoulders and tried to relax. Rotten holly hung in the air, refusing to dissipate yet. 

“Lo and behold, thought I’d be seeing Esme today, didn't I?” Jimmy shouted, jumping up out of the low boat. “It’s good to see you,” he said, sticking his hand out to shake. Jimmy’s petrol scent engulfed them, clouding the air and clinging to the mist. A convenient mask for Tommy’s scent. 

“Esme’s done a good job, she wanted a day off though.” Tommy said, breathing slowly as he shook Jimmy’s hand. 

“Well, ‘course she has. She’s a Lee.” Jimmy sniffed, rubbing a dirty hand over his nose. “Still not happy about that though, just so you know.” He leaned forward, eyeing Tommy as he stepped closer. 

Tommy’s eyes flicked up, tracking over Jimmy’s rough face. His usually cheerful eyes were serious, and his wind burnt nose nearly bumped Tommy’s cap.

“Omegas shouldn’t be putting themselves in these situations now, should they?” Jimmy said, his voice low, and quiet. 

Tommy’s heart jumped in his chest. Jimmy hadn’t ever said anything negative about Tommy being an omega, but maybe he’d thought Tommy had permission to be meeting with clients before? He couldn’t know about the rape. 

He couldn’t. 

The color drained from Tommy’s face and the lingering mist seemed to freeze around them. 

“Not the safest thing, this.” Jimmy said, clicking his tongue. 

“Esme’s her own person,” Tommy coughed, trying to ignore how brittle his voice sounded. He couldn’t have known. Tommy’s throat closed up, dry as bone amongst the soaked, damp canal. 

“Aye, that’s right.” Jimmy nodded and stepped back slightly. “She’s opinionated. She’ll tell you which curtains she likes and which horses she wants, but she gets it in her head sometimes, that she can do as she likes.” 

“She’s a grown adult, she can handle herself.” Tommy nodded, more for himself than Jimmy. 

“No, now,” Jimmy paused, his eyes darkening. He stepped closer again, lingering over Tommy. “You're not listening.” 

“Yes I am.” Tommy‘s response shot out of him. His heart thundered, pounding intensely as it leapt into his throat. _He was listening!_ Tommy thought violently, feeling a cold sweat breaking out across his forehead. _He was listening!_

“No, you’re not.” Jimmy said again in a gruff voice, “I don’t want anything happening-”

“Tommy!” 

Tommy flinched hard as Arthur’s voice echoed down the canal. 

Jimmy jerked away and whipped his head toward Arthur. Tommy followed suit, taking the opportunity to add even more distance between the two. 

“What the hell Tommy?” Arthur shouted, a worried look creasing his eyebrows as he stormed up to them. Tomm’s holly sweetened uncontrollably. It was cloying now, and dropped a sickening feeling into his stomach. 

Had Arthur been looking for him? Was he tailing him? 

Arthur’s coat swung around him in a violent arc and his petrichor scent thickened into a heavy damp cloud.

“Arthur!” Jimmy learned further away, eyeing Arthur with a nervous glance. 

“Back off!” Arthur snapped as he closed in. He threw himself between them and pushed Tommy behind him, shoving Jimmy off the slippery cobblestones. 

Jimmy stumbled, landing in a clumsy crouch in the long boat

“Arthur!” Tommy started, his hands raising with a nervous flinch. “Arthur calm down, It’s just a meeting!” 

“Why so close, Lee?” Arthur shouted, his hands wide as Jimmy struggled to right himself. 

“Arthur, hang on now,” Jimmy said, his own hands wide, mimicking Arthur’s. “We’re just having a business meeting, discussing-”

“Alfie!” Arthur shouted. “He’s here!”

Tommy fell backwards and landed against the wall, unable to stop the shudder of fear from rattling through him. 

“Arthur, no!” Tommy begged, his voice dropping to a whisper. His cap slid from his head, falling and landing somewhere in the thick bushes. Arthur ignored him, continuing to yell at Jimmy, but the sounds began blurring together, as though they were speaking underwater. 

He knew he shouldn’t be so afraid of Alfie finding out he’d set a meeting, but shame bit into his throat, and holly sweetened even further instinctually. 

They’d had several discussions about Tommy’s fear of Alfie’s retribution since they’d gotten back from Margate. Alfie had promised that Tommy was fine to make his own decisions. He made sure to repeat it often as well, in an attempt to make Tommy believe it. Campbell’s voice rang loudly in Tommy’s ears though. 

_‘Listen and behave.’_

He’d never asked for permission. He should’ve asked. He’d just run off, and now they thought he was about to be kidnapped. Again. Kent’s scent whispered up again, lingering on the stagnant puddles as it sank around Tommy.

Bonfire burned through the misty canal. 

“Arthur,” Jimmy’s voice murmured at the edge of the thick fog. “We’re family, Lee’s don’t hurt family!” 

“Arthur stop,” Tommy tried again, reaching for Arthur’s jacket, but it was just out of reach. “It’s an accident, he-”

“Tommy,” Alfie’s voice was quiet. 

Tommy’s eyes flew upwards, catching Alfie’s. He must’ve slid to the ground at some point. Alfie was kneeling, the cobblestones soaking into his trousers. 

“Jimmy didn’t do anything.” Tommy said quickly. “Don’t let Arthur kill him-”

“Arthur,” Alfie held a hand up, pausing him as he climbed to his feet and pulled Arthur away from the edge of the water. 

Too many angry scents were melding together into overwhelming mess, making Tommy’s head swim. Every paralyzing and fearful instinct in him pushed him to soften, and relax. He couldn't focus, and his head was too heavy. His knees fell open and a horrifying slick feeling dripped down his thighs. 

He whined, knowing instantly what was happening and dreading it. 

This had only happened once before, when they’d been in a pub in Margate. A loud, drunk group of alphas had crowded around the door, and Tommy’d tried to push past them. That night hadn’t ended well. 

Alfie had been so worried that he called a doctor, despite Tommy’s intense fear of them, given what had happened with the last one. After a terrifying examination, one Alfie had refused to leave the room for, the doctor said Tommy’s body had been trying to relax, and prepare for an oncoming assault. He’d tried to prescribe opium to help ease the effects, but Tommy’d been unable to stomach it. 

Apparently, it was a normal reaction for omegas. 

Tommy’d thrown up for several days after it had passed. 

He shivered, grimacing as his trousers dampened. He shouldn’t have set the meeting. He should’ve stayed home. 

“You’re alright, love.” Alfie cooed in his ear, the telltale scent giving Tommy away. Alfie’s bonfire was warm as his hands slid up Tommy’s rib cage. “Arthur’s going to handle it, did you drive here?” 

Tommy moaned and shook his head ‘no’. 

“Alright, I’ve got a car around the block, can you walk?” He asked, rubbing gentle circles into Tommy’s sides as he pulled him to his feet. 

Tommy’s knees shook, and a weakness rattled his legs. The slick feeling on his thighs trickled lower, and his legs nearly collapsed. Alfie’s hands slid higher up his ribcage, holding him tightly as he stumbled. 

Why did it have to be this reaction? 

“Tommy?” Alfie asked. 

Shame poured through him, rolling his stomach in a nauseating curl. 

“Yes,” Tommy mumbled finally, forcing his legs to stiffen. “I can walk.” 

Alfie breathed deeply in front of him, his face creased with worry as his shoulders lowered and his bonfire smoked heavily around them. It overpowered Arthur and Jimmy’s scents, giving Tommy something stronger to focus on. 

“Whenever you're ready.” Alfie said finally. 

They struggled down the path in a slow march. With Tommy having to stop every so often to clutch at Alfie’s arm or the slimy brick wall. 

His fear built the further they walked from Arthur. It clawed up his chest as they rounded the corner, and sat like a heavy lump in his throat.  
  
  


He was found out. Jimmy had to have realized, having now seen Tommy break down. He was being tailed as well. They didn’t trust him, nor did they believe in him. 

Worst of all, he was still afraid of Alfie. 

Why should he bother trying? Why should he try, when even his own body was against him? 

Warmth engulfed him, Alfie’s arms came around Tommy’s back, pulling him tight against Alfie’s chest. 

Alfie hummed a low note. The soothing sound rolled over Tommy, helping to clear his mind and encourage him to relax. His legs still trembled, though without Arthur or Jimmy around, Tommy found it harder to force himself to keep standing. 

“Brave thing you are,” Alfie said in his ear. Tommy blinked upwards, something in his chest loosening as he caught Alfie’s eyes. He allowed himself to sink fully into his strong arms, unable to hold himself up any longer. “How do you feel?” 

“Fucking awful.” Tommy said, unable to hide the truth. 

Every inch of his body was sore, muscles tense and strained from fear, and his body fighting against him to relax. His head felt like it’d been stuffed full with wool. It was heavy on his neck, and he couldn’t focus for more than a minute on anything.

“Are you cold?”

Tommy nodded, and felt a renewed sense of shame as Alfie tugged his coat off, and pulled it around Tommy’s shoulders. 

He shuddered as holly began blooming sweetly, and his legs trembled harder. Faint opium burned at the back of his mind, and his hands and feet went cold. Slick wetness ran down the back of his thighs again with a renewed fury, and his legs dropped out from under him. 

He didn’t want to be worried about Alfie hurting him, he didn’t want Alfie to see this reaction. 

“You’re ok, you’re fine!” Alfie said, catching Tommy with quick hands. His arm came under Tommy’s knees, and he hefted him high against his chest. 

Tommy swallowed down a nauseating roll in his stomach, and tried to fight the paralyzing feeling. 

“It’ll pass,” Alfie said, walking them toward the car. it went far faster without Tommy needing to pause every few seconds. “Short episodes, the doctor said, didn’t he?” Alfie climbed up a grimy brick stairway. “I’ve got you.” 

The miserable canal drifted into a blurry shape as the car came into view. 

“Mr. Solomons!”

Ollie’s concerned voice rang around them, and he tried to twist around to see, but Alfie’s hand came up, cupping the back of his head and scratching soothing shapes into the long hair on top. 

Finally, they were bundled into the back of the car. The leather was cool, and soft beneath his hands. Olli’s faint fresh scent was a blissful break from the confusion wracking through Tommy’s body. 

Alfie tugged Tommy close, wrapping his arms tightly around him again as the car started and began rattling down the bumpy street. 

Tommy’s eyes threatened to close every few seconds, the horrible episode weighing him down and deadening his arms and legs. Why hadn’t he just asked Alfie if he could go to the meeting in the first place? This wouldn’t have happened if he’d asked. 

He wondered what Arthur was saying to Jimmy. If Jimmy hadn’t actually meant anything by all of his posturing, and if he only wanted to make sure Esme was ok, or if he wanted to make fun of Tommy. He wondered how Arthur had known where he was, how long he’d been tailing him and and why Alfie had been close enough that Arthur could call him over. Was he actually being tailed, or was it just bad luck? 

“How did you know where I was?” Tommy asked with a whisper. 

“Arthur was worried, he said he hadn’t seen you since this morning and wanted to make sure you were alright.” Alfie said, his thumb slid down, rubbing a gentle circle over Tommy’s temple. “For the record love, I haven’t been following you.” 

Tommy hummed, and struggled to push himself up, fighting against his heavy arms as he looked Alfie in the eyes. 

“Arthur is though.” Tommy said. 

“Yeah, he is.” Alfie nodded. 

“He thinks I’m incapable.”

“He’s worried.” 

“And you’re not?” Tommy asked, dropping his heavy head onto Alfie’s shoulder and pressing his nose beneath his jaw.

“Of course I’m worried.” Alfie said. “I’m fucking worried all the time.” His arms tightened again. 

“What am I supposed to do then?” Tommy asked, his voice cracking as he pushed his face further into Alfie’s neck, breathing in his warm scent. The car jerked, bouncing over a pothole. “Nothing I’ve chosen seems to work, so why don’t you just fucking tell me what to do.” 

Alfie hefted Tommy higher, his arms solid around Tommy’s waist. 

“Nah,” Alfie said, “Now that, that's never a good plan with you, is it love?” 

“Alfie, I don’t know what to do.” 

He really didn’t. No one in the family took him seriously. He didn’t know how he could continue running his business from underneath their overbearing worry. 

Alfie paused, scratching lightly through Tommy’s hair again as he thought. Birmingham flew past the window, and the sprinkling of rain began to pick up, turning into a drizzle. Bonfire burned a little stronger, helping Tommy focus. 

“We’ll figure something out. We’ll just have to keep trying, won’t we?”

Tommy nodded in agreement. 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! (And thank you tumblr anon, for kicking me into tackling some fears!) I hope you enjoyed it very much, and please leave a comment if you did! They keep me writing and cheer me up like you wouldn’t believe.


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